My NYSC chronicles (chapter 3)

Today is Sunday. It's day 4 for me so I've seen a bit and I can say NYSC camp is more of washing your all white uniform than anything else. You're just between laundry really 😂. If you deep it they said they want to make us discipline, so this is probably that part in every good 'karate protégé' movie where the sensei just asks the student to do chores and fold clothes till one day he screams 'I'm tired of doing your chores old man, teach me to fighttt' and boom he unlocks the secret abara of the dragon, because unbeknownst to him the chores were summoning his inner chakra.

Let's see what I get out of this suffering guys. Before I go on I think it is important to mention that I didn't come here with a powerbank so my phone is almost always dead as our rooms have no sockets, the only way I can get to charge is in the camp market almost a kilometer away from my hostel, this gives me enough time to enjoy the authentic experience here, no distractions, just soaking up the suffering 24/7(I might really be onto something here guys), as wonderful as this might be however it makes it hard to for me to call my mom and sister who are always worried about me. Apparently texting I'm okay by 3: 50am before disappearing the whole day isn't effective communication. How was I to know?..

Anyhoo, I'm writing this from the multipurpose hall. I'm able to because.. We'll get to that. Today is Sunday. Sunday is a relatively chilled day here. I wasn't chased out of bed. Didn't have to take my bath by 2/3am like babalawo.

Also got to workout at the 'gym' and I met the real winner of the Mr Macho contest I'm no longer competing in. Causeee. 

I got breakfast with my meal ticket. Immediately after. Bread. Just bread lol. The usual hot water with a sprinkle of tea had finished. No boiled egg as usual too. This place is wild. Feeding militant just #50 bread??. Phew. This is Day 4 ladies and gentlemen and I've eaten eba 4 times. And that's asides today. If I die na eba kill me. 

Over the past days I've been scheming and looking for means to get out of parade. So I joined the OBS. (Orientation broadcasting something something) Media team really. I've been writing reports on camp programs, I've also anchored a sport program and unfortunately read sport news (didn't bargain for the last part at all). These get you out of all parades asides early morning parades. 

However, it's not definite I'll get selected at the end. So I joined the Red cross as back up.

Lol missed all the meetings and trainings because I'm too busy writing to have that time. But don't worry, I have a lot of experience from the time I was a Red cross member in primary 2. OBS is why I'm able to type now, cause I'm seated on the special seats reserved for the OBS crew, nobody is really policing us here.

I just clocked now that over the past 2 days we've had less parades actually and we have had them replaced with orientation lectures. Apparently we have 32 lectures. We're on #3. It's going to be a longgg week. However I was told we'd have 'fun' activities including football, Mr Macho, talent hunt. Yada yada. Let's see how that goes.

I was made Room governor and that's something else. I have to call attendance everyday after lights out and take care of how we'd keep the room clean. A 50 man room people, although we're about 43 in here. Tbf there's barely any heat here. The mosquito control is also crazy, I don't know what they did but I've not seen a single one yet.

With 50 people in a room you're bound to meet diverse ethnicity. The guys around my bunk are Hausa and I'm asking to learn some Hausa now. However these mischievous guys are bent on teaching me swear words and everything vulgar lol. I just wanted to be able to say good morning or something. I think I might also pick up some Igbo cause Igbo men are convinced I'm Igbo and won't stop speaking Igbo to me, this one time on the parade ground they just circled around where I stood and where having this intense convo, one turned to me as if to ask for my input,

they always seem heartbroken when I break it to them. I get stuff like this a few times in my hostel too, talmbout 'Nna', Ikemba I'm not your Nna!!!!. Speaking of languages they're these Ibadan boys in my room that totally crack me up with their dialect. It's like nothing I've ever heard before (well except in movies), refreshing stuff. 

Right now I should be writing reports on the 'briefing' being given by the State director but I love you guys more. Issue is I'm actually even summarizing so I can catch you up to speed. And then see if I can give daily posts, but its almost impossble here, probably have to go now, there's probably something I don't want to do that I have to do.